The angriest people in the world: Part one

Believe it or not, but there are people in this world that a way angrier than me. This thread is my tribute to these people (please read the irony).

Part one is about a group of pissed off people who have yelled at me a couple of times the past six months: People who work at the security checkpoints in airports.

What the hell is up with these people? Why are they so unbelievable angry? My theory is that they enjoy taking advantage of the position of power that they have been given. They know that us passengers are terrified of doing something wrong, and whenever we break one of their rules they act like we have just committed an act of terror. I mean every God damn time I walk through security they somehow make me fear that I have to spend the next 45 years in prison.

It’s like this every time: The security people are smiling laughing with each other, but that’s all a trick to make you fell safe. Then the security person, with the huge gun, turn to you. The smile and laugh is gone. The x-ray showed that you had a bomb in your bag, which obviously is your iPod that for some reason looks unmistakably like a bomb.
While going through your stuff the security person find a 100 ml deodorant in your bag. Now all hell is loose. The can of Axe (if you are American and have no sense of smell) is treated like it’s a threat to the entire universe. Now you’re sure that you’re going to spend at least a couple of nights in the slammer. I know it isn’t logical, but your mind doesn’t work when you are more afraid than you have been in your entire life.

To those of you who are going to fly soon, here are the rules you have to know, when you go through a security checkpoint:

- Don’t talk. I’m not saying don’t yell bomb, I’m saying don’t talk period!
- Look down at all times. Don’t ever look the security people directly in the eye, as they will take this as an act of aggression and instantly strip-search you!
- Don’t EVER put your laptop in the same tray as the rest of your stuff. This is probably the biggest of all sins. Not only in an airport but also in the world.
- Remove your belt, coins in your pockets, wedding ring, any metal plate or grenade splinters you may have. God have mercy on you if you set the metal detector off.

Normally angry people don’t scare me (that much), but it’s a different story when they have more guns than Arnold Schwarzenegger in Commando (I love that movie). And now we have given them the biggest gun of all: The-look-through-clothes-so-everybody-can-see-you-naked-and-talk-about-how-fat-you-are camera (I’m pretty sure this is not the official name for it, but whatever).
It seems like we’re installing these cameras in every airport (including Copenhagen). I know I know it’s to protect us against the theorists. But imagine what these pissed off security people can do with this kind of weapon. How long do you think it’ll be before one of these maniacs decide to punish us for setting the metal detector off or putting our laptop and wallet in the same tray and create the website www.uglynakedpeoplewhopissedmeoffattheairport.com? Am I the only one worrying about this?